Thursday, 31 January 2013

10 Things That Bug Me About HipHop...

I've thought about this for a little while now, and i thought i'd compile a short list of 10 things that bug me about hiphop. I could quite easily have made it a small list of 100 things, but no.. I thought i'd start with baby steps on this occasion.

Before you read on, yes, i know there are two sides to every coin and yes, there will be a list of 10 things i like about hiphop too, so chill the funk out and lets get this shit out the way...

1. Bling.

Why is this even remotely important? I don't give a fuck about your jewellery. Your chain that doubles up as a spare rim when you scratch one. A watch that can be seen from the international space station, rings the size of a watermelon and earrings that resemble a disco ball.

Can you say "Wanker"?

2. Cars.

Cars, whips, "fat" rides. Whatever you wish to call them. I see you driving around in them, but they almost cease to be "fat" if you don't actually "own" them. Renting cars and trying to front like you own them is like saying you're a thugged out boss, from the streets, when in actual fact you were a corrections officer at a correctional facility..........Oh, wait?

Goofy, rent-a-ride rappers!

3. Social Media Beef.

What is it with rappers airing out their shit on socia media? Get in the booth and make a record. Stand on the corner and battle under a street light. Get in the ring and punch on. I don't care, just get the fuck off twitter with that childish back & forth nonsense, for fucks sake!

4. Where's Your DJ?

The absence of the DJ. Where the fuck have they gone?! Tour DJs don't count. They should be the part of the group at all times, not an accessory for your road show.

There's nothing better than seeing a dope DJ get his chance to shine with the group, whether he's adding scratches as a filler or cutting up a scratch chorus.

It gives the whole set a real live feel and an interesting dynamic to what's going on. Seriously, that shit kicks arse at a hiphop show. Gangstarr, Dilated Peoples, Jurassic 5, all spring to mind immediately. All dope groups with dope DJs. Get a clue and bring back the DJ, DAMN IT!!!


6. Production.

I remember a time when you could hear certain beats and know who it was just by the drums they used or the way they chopped up a sample. Every producer had a signature sound. Nowadays, there's a billion "producers" and "beat makers" out there, all sounding the same, and all claiming they're hot. More often than not, it's a lie.

Take the time to learn. Be patient. Develop a style. People might actually respect and listen to your shit if they know you've put in work.

 7. Buff.....lessness.

With the latest Rick Ross drama it's clear he should probably be made to start wearing a bullet proof vest.

In all honesty, what he should be made to wear is a SHIRT. Period! Don't give me that "he's not fat, he's just big boned" or that whole "he's comfortable in his own skin, leave him be".

Comfortable my arse! what about the comfort levels of my eyeballs in their sockets? That's something i don't need to see! Same goes for toothpick rappers. Looking like you need a sponsorship deal with a steak house.

So if everyone in Hiphop could keep their shirt on, that would be greatly appreciated.

8. Fashion.

Times have changed in the game over the years and like most things, fashion was apart of it. Whether it's Weezy and his.. his.. uhh.. Everything, Andre 3000 and his rather, shall we say "flamboyant" style, or Kanye in a skirt, time's have definitely changed.

Which leads me to wondering - are you a hiphop artist? Or a fashionista looking to open a fashion haus?

I shiver at the thought.

9. Classic Tracks.

Where are they? The monster that is "The Industry" - has made what i hold near and dear, all about profit margins and an artists worth. It comes down to how fast he / she / they can pump out ones product to the masses. Artists are dropping multiple releases in a single year, which in turn, leads to sub-par performances and far from memorable music for the most part.

Dr Dre for instance.. admittedly, not the best rapper in the world. But he's realesed very few albums when you think about it, yet we remember them in great detail when he does. Numerous hits and songs we can associate a time and place in our own lives with.

It could be a number of factors . More artists. Easier to release music, or less time and effort required to produce a product for people to hear. In all honesty, i don't know what it is. But what i do know is this.

They're not making music like they used too.

10. Wackness.

Stop accepting it. Stop agreeing with the masses, thinking what you see and hear is all there is to it. Do research, expand your hiphop play lists. It's amazing what you come across when you look for it.

There are talented artists that don't get the shine they deserve because of the mountain of shit in the way, which now puts the ball in your court, so to speak. It's up to the avid hiphop fan to dig through that mountain of shit and find these artists and start sharing it with others.

Fuck the rubbish off. Embrace and share the talented artists.

Like I Said...

I had to get the shit out of the way first, but i'll be sure to let you know when i drop the "10 Things I Like About HipHop" when i get around to it. Word up!


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